"I was going to start off tonight with an Obama joke, but I don't want to get audited by the IRS."One can easily imagine a petulant That One phoning Steve Burke: “Dude, stifle that Leno guy, would you?”
On NSA surveillance: "We wanted a president who listens to all Americans - now we have one."
On a new IRS commissioner: "He's called 'acting commissioner' because he has to act like the scandal doesn't involve the White House."
On closing the Guantanamo prison for terrorists: "If he really wants to close it, turn it into a government-funded solar power company. The doors will be shut in a month."
Concerning the Benghazi, Associated Press, and IRS scandals: "Remember in the old days when President Obama's biggest embarrassment was Joe Biden?"
On Obama saying he didn't know about the IRS scandal: "He was too busy not knowing anything about Benghazi to not know anything about the IRS."
"The White House has a new slogan about Benghazi : Hope and change the subject."
"It's casual Friday, which means that at the White House, they're casually going through everybody's phone calls and records."
"It is not looking good for President Obama. Today his teleprompter took the fifth."
"Fox News has changed its slogan from 'Fair and Balanced' to 'See, I told you so!'"
On Obama's commencement address: "He told the young graduates their future is bright unless, of course, they want jobs."
On a Chicago man who set a record for riding a Ferris wheel: "The only other way to go around and around in a circle that many times is to read the official report on Benghazi."
On White House claims of ignorance on the scandals: "They took 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell' out of the Pentagon and moved it into the White House."
"These White House scandals are not going away anytime soon. It's gotten so bad that People in Kenya are now saying he's 100 percent American."
Monday, May 5, 2014
Is this why Jay Leno was involuntarily retired by NBC?
Is this why Jay Leno was involuntarily retired by NBC? A collection of his one-liners that just may have contributed to the network's decision, via reader Simi L.:
Jason and Cici, together again...
California leads the way...
California leads the way ... in Congressional insanity, business unfriendliness, and doom.
Liberal Maryland rejoices – because some other state is so business-hostile that it might drive some to consider relocating to not-quite-so-business-hostile Maryland. More likely, Texas will get the fleeing entrepreneurs, though...
Liberal Maryland rejoices – because some other state is so business-hostile that it might drive some to consider relocating to not-quite-so-business-hostile Maryland. More likely, Texas will get the fleeing entrepreneurs, though...
Have they not eyes to see with?
Have they not eyes to see with? This self-proclaimed progressive does. Perhaps the cruelest aspect of modern progressivism is that its anti-capitalism stance dooms millions of people to short lives and abject poverty. Caleb Rossiter wants nothing to do with that...
The trees are gone...
The trees are gone... The big trees planted right next to the house, that is. Debbie and I took the last one – the biggest – down yesterday afternoon. Its trunk was roughly oval at the bottom, 14" by 11", so there was quite a bit of wood in it. I sure was glad to have a chainsaw for that one :) After we cut it all up and loaded it onto my pickup, we had a pile of debris occupying roughly 3 cubic yards, quite compressed – more than the other two trees combined...
This changed the appearance of the front of the house considerably. It also opened up several south-facing windows, so the house should be considerably brighter now on a fine day...
This changed the appearance of the front of the house considerably. It also opened up several south-facing windows, so the house should be considerably brighter now on a fine day...