Pater: “The Treatment”...

Pater: “The Treatment”...  At right, the top of Copper Gulch with Red Mountain in the background, where my dad and I spent hours wandering through meadows full of wildflowers on July 17th, 2005.

The Treatment...

Anyone who visited our home in the '50s or '60s (and possibly later) was potentially a target of The Treatment.  Generally speaking (though there were some exceptions), any given individual would have The Treatment administered once, and then they were exempt from further administrations – and could even participate in administering The Treatment to someone else.

What was The Treatment?  There was no precise definition, but generally speaking it included (a) ice cubes down the pant legs while being held upside down, and (b) unconstrained tickling while being held to the floor by a horde of torturers.  My dad was the boss of The Treatment administration.

I never fully understood the rules that determined exactly who would be subjected to The Treatment, but it certainly included any of my friends that I might invite over for a visit, so kids were definitely eligible.  Some adults were also eligible.

One of my high school friends, Nom Loy, was given The Treatment on his second visit to our home.  More than 20 years later, he talked with me of his disbelief and shock when my whole family worked together to capture him, restrain him, throw him on the floor, pick him up by the legs, and then pour a bowl full of ice cubes down his pants legs.  This was so far outside his experience of family behavior that he simply couldn't process it.  He could tell by our laughter that we weren't actually threatening him, yet our behavior suggested an attack.  My mom pouring the ice cubes down his pants legs was the ultimate shock for him, the utter and absolute loss of all dignity – past, present, and future.  All those years later, Nom still remembered his experience with The Treatment as traumatic – but he also recognized that afterward he was much more comfortable around us, much less careful and reserved. 

While I was growing up, I never thought of our tradition of The Treatment as particularly unusual.  The first time I can remember recognizing it as unusual family behavior was in Navy boot camp, in Orlando, Florida.  A few of my fellow recruits were horsing around, and had wrestled their target to the floor.  I suggested ice cubes down the pants legs to them, and that started a long discussion wherein I described The Treatment and they marveled that my family wasn't locked up in the loony bin.  But they did get the ice cubes :)

I still have never met another person whose family had some tradition resembling The Treatment...