Birdemic...

Birdemic is apparently a recently released movie.  I haven't watched a movie in years, and there is zero probability that I'll ever watch this one, even before reading these reviews on IMDB (at the behest of a friend who thought that this was a movie I might actually want to see). 

But the reviews themselves...now that's a whole 'nother story.  Those make very entertaining reading.  Here's my favorite:

Where does one start? How can you mentally digest something like Birdemic? I am still in shock. I have seen some shitty movies in my time. But Birdemic, friends and neighbors, is the worst movie in the history of film-making, on this planet or in any other dimension for that matter. It is bad, OMG, right off the scale on the shitometer. The acting? Poor Alan Bagh, is he a living, walking wooden plank? Special effects? I swear, the birds are cardboard cutouts dangling from strings. For some reason, they explode when they hit something. Why? Why is that? Can't somebody explain, for freak's sake?

Everything stinks so very gaggingly. A rhesus monkey with a camcorder poking out of its arse would do better. Beware, my friends, beware of this abomination that is Birdemic.