Timeless Political Humor

Simi L. sent these along. Many of these I had heard before, but not all. They're all great – both funny and wise…

If you don't read the newspaper you are uninformed, if you do read the newspaper you are misinformed.
– Mark Twain

Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But then I repeat myself...
– Mark Twain

I contend that for a Nation to try to tax itself into prosperity is like a man standing in a bucket and trying to lift himself up by the handle.
– Winston Churchill

A government which robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul.
– George Bernard Shaw

Democracy must be something more than two wolves and a sheep voting on what to have for dinner.
– James Bovard, Civil Libertarian (1994)

Foreign aid might be defined as a transfer of money from poor people in rich countries to rich people in poor countries.
– Douglas Casey

Government is the great fiction through which everybody endeavors to live at the expense of everybody else.
– Frederic Bastiat, French Economist (1801-1850)

I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.
– Will Rogers

If you think health care is expensive now, wait until you see what it costs when it's free!
– P.J. O'Rourke

In general, the art of government consists of taking as much money as possible from one party of the citizens to give to the other.
– Voltaire (1764)

Just because you do not take an interest in politics doesn't mean politics won't take an interest in you!
– Pericles (430 B.C.)

No man's life, liberty, or property is safe while the legislature is in session.
– Mark Twain (1866)

Talk is cheap...except when Congress does it.
– Unknown (but widely attributed to Mark Twain)

The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of the blessings. The inherent blessing of socialism is the equal sharing of misery.
– Winston Churchill

The only difference between a tax man and a taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin.
– Mark Twain

The ultimate result of shielding men from the effects of folly is to fill the world with fools.
– Herbert Spencer, English Philosopher (1820-1903)

There is no distinctly native American criminal class … save Congress.
– Mark Twain

What this country needs are more unemployed politicians.
– Edward Langley, Artist (1928 - 1995)

A government big enough to give you everything you want, is strong enough to take everything you have.
– Thomas Jefferson

Jamulian Eateries...

By request (of Bob Clay), here are our favorite places to eat in or near Jamul (using Jamul to mean the entire unincorporated area, not just the town). I've listed these starting with the places we frequent the most often, which is probably as good a measure of "favorite" as anything...

Bravo Cafe: we count a stop at Manoli's place as one of our favorite things to do, even without considering the food. The people there are just wonderful folks. These days you'll most often find Manoli with his daughter Esmeralda and his son Milton helping out, along with a couple of employees who fit right into the family's style: friendly, helpful, and just plain nice to be around. And then there's the food: Manoli's superb soups (the chicken rice and meatball soups are my favorites), the sandwiches (huge piles of good stuff on plain-but-good breads), and the salads (simple but fresh, crisp, and plentiful).

Descanso Junction Restaurant: good food, good people, and a home-style atmosphere. Some of their soups are really quite good (the tomato Florentine and chicken and big fat noodle soups are my favorites), the burgers are great, and they have many other delectables to choose from. Yesterday I had an excellent omlet (the “gourmet”) that was classic American fare: a simple plain-egg omlette filled with bacon, sausage, green peppers, onions, and cheese. They are often overwhelmed by motorcycle clubs (of the harmless middle-aged fake biker variety) around lunch on weekends, so watch your timing on visits there.

Yuki Sushi: reliably good sushi at reasonable prices, and very friendly people. Even at reasonable prices, sushi is expensive, so we don't get there as often as we'd really like to. Since Tatsu's closed several years ago, this is our sushi haunt. We've tried the other local places, but don't like them nearly as well.

Behind-the-7/11 Mexican: sorry, but I don't know the name of this place. It's behind the 7/11 at Steele Canyon and 94, in the back of a small Mexican grocery. We go in there to get fresh giant flour tortillas, and often come out with burritos as well. The people there have always been very friendly with us, though we have the occasional language difficulty (some of them speak very little English, and we speak absolutely no Spanish). When I get a craving for carnitas, or some chicken enchiladas, or a carne asada burrito, this is where I go...