The Cost of Junk Science

Some 14 years ago, in the midst of a firestorm of lawsuits and irresponsible, sensationalist journalism, the FDA banned silicone breast implants. The notion was that the implants were dangerous; that women with the silicone implants risked horrible side effects, disfiguring and even life-threatening.

These alleged side effects were entirely fabricated by the attorneys filing the frenzy of related lawsuits. Every single study ever done of silicone breast implants — and there have been many — have shown them to be safe.

The FDA’s ban occurred during the reign of David Kessler as commissioner — a very political appointee of the Clinton administration. The FDA’s own scientists recommended against the ban (for lack of any credible evidence). They were overridden by the political appointee. Surely there must be a better way than to let good science be overridden by a junk-science driven political appointee…

Worse, though, the ban directly enabled the success of many completely bogus lawsuits. Hundreds of millions of dollars were awarded to supposed “victims” of silicone breast implants (each and every one of these has been thoroughly debunked). Companies went bankrupt because they happened to have a division somehow related to silicone breast implants. Thousands of people lost their jobs. The total economic cost, depending on whose estimate you care to believe, ranged from $1.5 billion to $4.5 billion. All for no good reason whatsoever. It is exactly as though we all held a big party, made a pile of billions of dollars in cash, and then burned it. The only winners were the unscrupulous lawyers pursuing these bogus suits.

And now, the FDA has reversed itself. Fourteen years after issuing the popular bogus ban, the firestorm has died down enough to let science prevail over idiocy. Silicone breast implants are suddenly safe again. Companies can once again start manufacturing and selling them in the U.S. (they never stopped in the rest of the world, where on this subject they seem to consider Americans to have lost their collective minds).

What a waste.

But it happens repeatedly, and is happening right now. Just Google “junk science” and you’ll get thousands of hits discussing the impact it has on our legal system. There have been some hopeful developments in recent years, but they are like tiny islands in the vast sea of depressingly ill-informed “justice”.

How can this issue be better addressed than it is today? Should we require judges to have expertise in the area being litigated? Or should we even go so far as to require juries to have expertise in the area, or at least a background that would prepare them to understand it? These are some of the solutions I’ve seen proposed. There are some practical problems (e.g., where do you find all these judges or juries with expertise?) and some philosophical problems (on what principle do you rest the notion that “experts” are better qualified to judge these matters?), but on the whole I think that such a system would beat what we have today.

Any other ideas out there?

Quote(s) of the Day

A friend sends this collection of quotes attributed to the comedian Steven Wright…

I’d kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.

Borrow money from pessimists — they don’t expect it back.

Half the people you know are below average.

99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name.

82.7% of all statistics are made up on the spot.

A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.

A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

All those who believe in psychokinesis, raise my hand.

The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

I almost had a psychic girlfriend.....but she left me before we met.

OK, so what’s the speed of dark?

How do you tell when you’re out of invisible ink?

If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.

Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.

When everything is coming your way, you’re in the wrong lane.

Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.

Hard work pays off in the future, laziness pays off now.

I intend to live forever......so far, so good.

If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

Eagles may soar, but weasels don’t get sucked into jet engines.

What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

My mechanic told me, “I couldn’t repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder."

Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?

If at first you don’t succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.

A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.

Experience is something you don’t get until just after you need it.

The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread.

To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.

The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.

The sooner you fall behind, the more time you’ll have to catch up.

The colder the X-ray table, the more of your body is required to be on it.

Everyone has a photographic memory; some just don’t have film.

If your car could travel at the speed of light, would your headlights work?

Smartasses

Tip o’the hat to Dick Foster:

The Top Six Smartass Answers:

#6:

It was mealtime during a flight on Hooters Airline. “Would you like dinner?” the flight attendant asked John, seated in front.

"What are my choices?” John asked.

"Yes or no,” she replied.

— — —

#5:

A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets. As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket and he opened his trench coat and flashed her. Without missing a beat, she said, “Sir, I need to see your ticket not your stub."

— — —

#4:

A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store but she couldn’t find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy, “Do these turkeys get any bigger?” The stock boy replied, “No ma’am, they’re dead."

— — —

#3:

The cop got out of his car and the kid who was stopped for speeding rolled down his window.

"I’ve been waiting for you all day,” the cop said.

The kid replied, “Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could."

When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a ticket.

— — —

#2:

A truck driver was driving along on the freeway. A sign comes up that reads, “Low Bridge Ahead.” Before he knows it, the bridge is right ahead of him and he gets stuck under the bridge. Cars are backed up for miles. Finally, a police car comes up. The cop gets out of his car and walks to the truck driver, puts his hands on his hips and says, “Got stuck, huh?” The truck driver says, “No, I was

> delivering this bridge and ran out of gas."

— — —

#1; the “smart ass answer of the year":

A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow’s final exam. “Now class, I won’t tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury, illness, or a death in your immediate family, but that’s it, no other excuses

whatsoever!"

A smart-ass guy in the back of the room raised his hand and asked, “What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and utter sexual exhaustion?"

The entire class is reduced to laughter and snickering. When silence is restored, the teacher smiles knowingly at the student, shakes her head and sweetly says, “Well, I guess you’d have to write the exam with your other hand."

Definition of the Day

In my email:

Political Correctness

A doctrine fostered by a delusional, illogical, liberal minority, and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end.

I can think of nothing to add.