Lamestream Parody

Tip o’the hat to JimM for this gem:

The Pope is visiting Washington, D.C., and President Bush takes him out for an afternoon on the Potomac, cruising on the Presidential yacht, the Sequoia. They’re admiring the sights when, all of a sudden, the Pope’s hat (zucchetto) blows off his head and out into the water.

Secret Service guys start to launch a boat, but President Bush waves them off, saying, “Wait, wait. I’ll take care of this. Don’t worry."

Bush then steps off the yacht onto the surface of the water and walks out to the Holy Father’s little hat, bends over, picks it up, and then walks back to the yacht and climbs aboard. He hands the hat to the Pope amid stunned silence.

The next morning, the headlines in the New York Times, Boston Globe, Atlanta Constitution, Washington Post, Boston Herald, Buffalo News, Houston Chronicle, Milwaukee Sentinel-Journal, Minneapolis Tribune, Denver Post, Albuquerque Journal, Los Angeles Times, and San Francisco Chronicle all proclaim:

"Bush Can’t Swim!"

Oh, come on now — you know that’s exactly what would happen!

Rain in July...

And pretty soon, you’ve got a half inch of rain. In these parts, a half inch of rain is not the usual July experience — July here is normally comprised of wall-to-wall blue skies, hot and dry days, and cool, comfortable nights. This July saw us with relatively humid days (along with the hot), quite a few uncomfortably warm nights, and rain.

Weirdness!

But welcome weirdness. The native desert plants that surround us are experts at slurping up this unexpected moisture; they will all benefit (and they were already in robust good shape because of the spring rains). The weeds will most likely pop up again — we’ll know that in a day or two. And perhaps most importantly: the fuel (mainly dead plant material, wood, twigs, and leaves) is now all dampened down again, and it will take a bunch of hot, dry days to dry it all out. That translates into reduced fire danger for several weeks, at least.

We like rain!