Seriously Loony

Isn’t it amazing that someone as overtly insane as Kim Jong-il could be the leader of anything, much less an entire country? Now this maroon has gone and tested a nuclear weapon, or at least claimed that they did — the official North Korean press release:

The field of scientific research in the DPRK successfully conducted an underground nuclear test under secure conditions on October 9, 2006, at a stirring time when all the people of the country are making a great leap forward in the building of a great, prosperous, powerful socialist nation.

It has been confirmed that there was no such danger as radioactive emission in the course of the nuclear test as it was carried out under scientific consideration and careful calculation.

The nuclear test was conducted with indigenous wisdom and technology 100 percent. It marks a historic event as it greatly encouraged and pleased the KPA and people that have wished to have powerful self-reliant defense capability.

It will contribute to defending the peace and stability on the Korean Peninsula and in the area around it.

This press release is so bad (as are virtually all of them from North Korea) that it’s hard to take seriously. They need a new PR agency, badly…

Initial reports said that seismic activity consistent with magnitude 3.58 earthquake on the surface was detected. The USGS has an automated earthquake reporting system that publishes to the web (see map at right); they are reporting a 4.2 earthquake, on the surface. These reports indicate that a large explosion took place — the equivalent of between 550 and 4500 tons of TNT. So North Korea either set off an amazingly small nuclear explosion (perhaps a failed weapon), or a very large conventional explosion. The lamestream media is reporting it as if it was a confirmed nuclear explosion, though no evidence other than seismic has been presented, and the seismic evidence is ambiguous. I suspect that stupidity, sensationalism, and political expediency are combining to make this happen — after all, a nutjob with a nuke is far more sensational than a pathetic loser with a fake nuke or a fizzled nuke.

But other sources are much less confident that fearless leader Kim actually pulled off a nuke. The speculation seems pretty evenly divided between a nuke that fizzled and an outright piece of fakery. Supporters of the first notion point to similar fizzles with the Kimster’s ICBM tests; supporters of the second notion point to the careful mention (in the press release) that there was no radiation leak — as atmospheric radiation is normally how nuke tests are confirmed.

Who knows what the truth is? And it may not actually matter, because the test — whether faked, fizzled, or factual — has got everybody in the neighborhood in a tizzy. Japan and China are talking about their mutual security, a circumstance not quite as likely as pigs suddenly starting to fly around. Japan and South Korea are integrating their intelligence and defense efforts — another unlikely pair. About the only unexcited neighbor is Russia, and I’m not sure why that is. Maybe they just like the idea of a destabilizing influence on their border.

As others have noted, it’s really hard to deal with a lunatic — whether you’re talking about people or countries. You can’t negotiate, you can’t make agreements. About the only choices we have are (a) ignore them, or (b) conquer them. The first choice gets less attractive every day…