Grabbing the chainsaw

To understand this story, you need one little piece of background... We recently adopted a little kitten, from a batch of feral kittens that Debi raised a few weeks ago. She is part of a cat rescue organization that (among other things) takes the kittens of feral mom-cats and acclimates them to human contact, thus making them very adoptable. One of these kittens both of us fell in love with -- a little guy who looks a lot like a miniature "Maine coon" cat, with beautiful gray and brown tabby markings, a pronounced bobcat-like face, and great big paws. Right now he's about 10 weeks old, weighs a couple of pounds, and is playful and active just like any other kitten. We've named this guy Halala Pala (at right; click for a larger view)...

Debi and I were sleeping a little later than usual this morning. I was the first one up, at 4 am, peering out the window to see if the anticipated storm had started dumping some rain on us (it hadn't). Since I was up anyway, I walked, half asleep, into the bathroom to donate the previous evening's iced tea to our septic tank. I did this in the usual fashion, standing in front of the toilet. All was well with the world, or so I thought...when out of the corner of my eye, I spotted Halala, in full scamper, headed straight for the toilet.

You see, we have one of those shaggy covers for our toilet lid, and the cats all love to perch on those lids. Halala had discovered the delights of the shaggy toilet lid some time ago, but apparently he had not yet discovered that the shaggy cover wasn't always there.

Even in my half-asleep state, it was clear to me that Halala headed for the toilet was possible trouble. I didn't realize quite how much trouble, though...

There's something else you need to understand. If you're female, you may not realize that a man "in full stream", as it were, cannot just immediately turn off the spigot. It takes a few seconds to shut down the system. And a little kitten in full scamper can go a long way in a few seconds. And I was half asleep...

So Halala did just what you've guessed by now. I can play it over in my mind's eye: a little kitten, launching himself, with claws extended on all four paws, toward his intended shaggy perch so he could say hello to his human in the morning. A little kitten, simultaneously noting the absence of his shaggy footing, and a stream of vile liquid hitting him in the head. A little kitten, twisting his head to look up at his human with a look of absolute astonishment on his face. A little kitten, falling into an evil trap, full of foul-smelling water. A little kitten, spitting, hissing, scrabbling on the smooth sides of the toilet, trying to get a grip so he could get out -- and failing.

A few seconds later, the spigot finally off, I faced something not particularly pleasant (especially considering it was 4 am). I had to reach down and grab my poor little Halala, to rescue him. This was like grabbing for a running chainsaw blade in a bucket of urine. What fun!

I finally got poor little Halala out of the toilet. He was one pissed-off (and pissed on) kitten! Next up was a bath, which of course cheered him up even more. It took a while before he would condescend to be near us again...